Most people think marine dress uniforms look better than Army dress uniforms unless the latter has a beret; the biggest eye sore is the high-peaked "dunce" cap on the Army Class "A" uniform. A lot of warriors could be attracted to Army combat arms if the Army Class A uniform were approved. The "garrison" cap looked good on General Gavin in World War II with a big glider/parachute patch, but we are not in WWII. This is because he and his Paratroopers were allowed to wear their caps with personality: dimples and "crushes". If you see the "Beetle Bailey" comic strip you'll see this. But today's Army uniform regulations, AR 670-1 forbids wearing the garrison cap with any esperit! We should adopt a shorter garrison cap, which is not as high, dye it Army green and make it part of the uniform for non-combat arms units without berets. Combat arms units that are not SF (Green beret), Rangers (black beret) or Airborne (Maroon beret) should wear a brown beret. Recruiters who are so qualified should be able to wear their berets NOW to put forth the best Army appearance possible. [2005 UPDATE: since the time this web page was posted in 1998, the Army wisely adopted an universal beret.]

UGLY: LOOKS LIKE A CHRISTMAS TREE

The green Class "A" jacket with ribbons, branch insignia, regimental crest, skill badges, nameplate, unit/combat patches is too cluttered with contrasting colors/ornamentation. To bring out and accent these awards, the uniform's buttons should be black instead of shiny gold so it doesn't compete with awards for the eye's focus. Black is one of the Army's colors, along with gold. Changing to black buttons would be inexpensive, quick and easy; the pocket buttons are only held by kotter pins. Only the jacket front and shoulder epaulet buttons need sewing in order to be replace. A black plastic cap that snaps over these buttons could subdue them without removing or sewing on new buttons.

PROFESSIONAL: STREAMLINED, FOCUSED, DRAWS ATTENTION TO WHAT COUNTS NOT GARMENT FURNITURE

When we suggested this low-cost idea of black plastic caps to cover over the gaudy class "a" uniform coat buttons this is the ABSURD non-sense we got from HQDA Excuse-a-crat: (actual letter redacted to protect the guilty)

"Thank-you for your suggested change to AR 670-1 that we received on DA Form 2028, Recommended Changes to Publications and Blank Forms.

Your recommendation that we change the color of the service and dress uniform buttons from a gold color to black is not favorably considered.

In the history of our uniform, the Army has gone through myriad changes in the design of the uniform. However, one constant has been the use of metal buttons, whether pewter as in the Revolutionary War, or the present gold-colored buttons. Additionally, in the late 1800's, the army began the separation of dress and work uniforms by adopting a camouflage color uniform.

The use of black buttons would blur the distinction between work and dress uniforms. Additionally, the gold buttons balance the appearance of the uniform with the other gold insignia that are worn. If you feel your individual uniform looks too garish, you have the option of not wearing all your awards, IAW paragraph 28-3b, AR 670-1.

We appreciate your interest in the Army uniform. If you need further assistance, my point of contact is XXXXXXXXXXXXXX, (XXX) XXX-XXXX.

Sincerely,

Head-in-Sand Excuse-o-crat
LTC, U.S. Army

AS YOU CAN SEE FROM THE ABSURD REPLY WE ARE IN DIRE DANGER OF SOLDIERS ACCIDENTALLY ONE DAY GOING TO PT OR THE FIELD WITH THEIR CLASS "A" UNIFORMS IF WE HAVE THEM WITH BLACK BUTTONS!

NOT!

The marine class "A" uniform equivalent (called Dress Greens, see above picture) has black buttons. Even the not-too-bright marine knows its a DRESS/REPORTING FOR DUTY STATION TYPE UNIFORM not a WORK uniform. The gyrene above doesn't look like he's going to go clean a latrine. Also notice how the black buttons are not drawing attention to themselves and make the uniform overall look well-presented with the ribbons the only things standing out.

First, notice he did not even acknowledge the suggestion for how it could improve the uniform's appearance, raise morale of the troops, help recruiting & retention etc. He clearly doesn't give a flying fuck about those of lesser rank. He's got his daily diet of people "yesssiiring" him every day so he doesn't feel like he's wearing a clown suit--even though he is if he's wearing the Army class "A" uniform!. Now back to the HQDA excuse-o-crat.

Next, he as a classic bureaucratic gate-keeper employs the circular reason madness; since the ARMY has determined that black buttons are for "work" and shiny buttons for "dress" it doesn't matter what outside reality thinks; the Army has set a stupid idea into stone, refers back to that stupidity and then claims its internally consistent with--not the FACTS, not the reality of the world around us--BUT ITSELF. The Army decides to do something stupid, then boasts it is consistent about doing the stupidity and claims it as some kind of quasi virtue. Circular, inbred reasoning. This kind of in-bred illogic is common with the Dixonian insecure military mind that is attracted to military service in the first place; its full of doubts about manhood, personal value so it goes to an organization that promises that if you stick to the rigid set of internal rules and pre-conceived notions you will be safe and protected and even promoted. Never mind, that the USMC has had black buttons on its dress uniforms for dozens of years and their uniforms are universally regarded as better looking than the Army's dress uniforms. Nevermind that NO ONE ON PLANET EARTH would think of black buttons on a MILITARY uniform where WAR and the black color are synonymous would be wrong except a HQDA asshole "gatekeeper" full of inward excuses to not admit to Army mistakes and correct them. It would be a sure bet that had General Shinseki not ordered him to adopt the Army-wide black beret, that this snobby asshole would have been against it with a myriad of concocted internal inbred reasons, too.

Lastly, you see at the end of his "fuck-you-o-gram", he signs off with the bureaucracy's common generic directive, ITS ON YOU---THE INDIVIDUAL---TO FIX THE PROBLEM. If the army supplies you a gaudy Class "A" uniform with a Christmas tree assortment of shiny buttons, ITS ON YOU TO TAKE YOUR HARD-EARNED AWARDS OFF to stop the glare from burning out the irises in everyone around you's eyes. Since you probably can't afford to walk around with a bag of welder's goggles to hand out to people when you are in your class "A" uniform, its ON YOU THE INDIVIDUAL to diminish your self, because THE ARMY BUREAUCRACY COMES FIRST. The shiny buttons come before you and your awards. In street vernacular, its "FUCK YOU"--you have no value in this organization. Not only does the Army not give a damn about what YOU THINK, what the rest of the WORLD THINKS, what REALITY consists of, it doesn't give a damn ABOUT YOU. So what that YOU are putting YOUR LIFE on the line in dangerous military service? These are bureaucrats who are in BUILDINGS safe from enemy attacks even if a hijacked airliner smashes into them. They are not in any immediate danger of dying. Is it a wonder that America's youth after seeing DoD (Rumsfeld who resides in a safe air-conditioned Pentagon office: "you go with the Army you have not the one you wish to have"), the Army and marines "fuck them" by sending them to their deaths in Humvee/Stryker trucks are returning the insult by refusing to enlist or join an officer commissioning program?

We bet if it was "LT. Shinseki" presenting the black beret idea to this guy, he would have gotten a similar list of absurd excuses. NOBODY except this bureaucrat in the Army is taught that minutiae like button symbolism is a "sacred cow" tradition; he pulled that one out of his hat. The fact is that the Army class "A" uniform looks cruddy and is too cluttered by conflicting colors, and when LEADERS THAT CARE see a problem, THEY SOLVE IT, not make excuses to rationalize that everything is AOK. The black buttons would also help harmonize the new Army black beret with the class "A" uniform. Apparently when a General officer has a "good idea" all of a sudden the bureaucrats go silent. Now that its CSA General Shinseki TELLING HIM TO MAKE THE BLACK BERET A GO, he doesn't say a peep. This is EXACTLY the kind of head-in-the-sand, we-have-always-done-it-this-way non-sense that makes ADULTS leave the Army. No amount of pay/benefits can compensate for an organization that doesn't self-correct and act on the input of its members. "We appreciate your interest in the Army uniform"; no they don't. If they did they would TRY THE IDEA, then present it to Senior Army Leaders and let THEM DECIDE. Instead to reduce the amount of work he has to do and to maintain the status quo the excuse-o-crat blows you off out-of-hand.

Typical!

We will say one positive thing however, at least the Army does say "thank-you for trying", experiences with the marines are that they will seek some kind of retribution for not fawning at the feet of the marine corps pagan god of propaganda.

Thanks to CSA General Shinseki, Berets are a GO!

We also suggested a few years before that Army recruiters who are Airborne-qualified should be able to wear the maroon beret, Rangers the black (now tan) and Special Forces, the green. This would enhance Army recruiting efforts as evidence of the quality of Soldiers in the Airborne/Special Operations units. 1^st Tactical Studies Group (Airborne) Director Mike Sparks even e-mailed Army Recruiting Command in 1997 and made these suggestions via e-mail.

We originally proposed we get combat arms MOS a brown beret, but even better the entire Army has now gone to BLACK berets, which will give the Army the upper hand in the recruiting image war over the gyrenes. Snobby assholes like the LTC uniform nazi above must be pissed.

The Class "B" with black epaulet slip-on rank insignia is sharp and would be "unbeatable" with a beret, it's tops.

Fighting spirit is built by the small things: an organization dedicated to excellence, unselfish leaders, sharp uniforms, superb field equipment. We must leave "no stone uncovered" until we are the best fighting force ever.

If you wish to submit a suggestion and get a stay-in-your-lane reply, please send it on a DA Form 2028 to the following address:

HQDA
ATTN: DAPE-HR-PR
300 Army Pentagon
Washington, DC 20310-0300

Visit the Army uniform webpage at:

www.odcsper.army.mil/default.asp?pageid=69f

POC:

HQDA Uniform Policy
Ft. Belvoir, Va
DSN 225-6361
COM (703) 695-6361
FAX: DSN 223-0212 COM (703) 693-0212

Epilogue

While uniforms will help, in the aftermath of 9/11 they are clearly not enough and our people are rejecting military service, but its NOT from the difficult and dangerous job in Iraq. Its because they don't want to be a part of a LOSING TEAM that defecates on them constantly. Word from returning vets about the military's incompetence and corruption have not been lost on today's savvy youth. They can see the daily images of burning Humvee trucks on TV and can put 2+2 together that SOMEONE SENT THOSE AMERICAN TO DIE IN THOSE FLIMSY SUVS IN THE FIRST PLACE. There is a real crisis in the U.S. military today caused by the snobby, existentialist narcissist culture. A crisis that the old standby 19th century BS of spit 'n polish parade ground antics not only doesn't work on today's lethal non-linear battlefields, it robs us of valuable time WHEN EVER NEED TO SPEND EVERY DAMN SECOND OF EVERY DAY GETTING COMBAT READY. So now years after trying to get a better respect for our Soldiers by a minor uniform improvement, we at the 1st TSG (A) are of the Israeli Defense Force (IDF) mind and are now against dress uniforms PERIOD. Keep the "clown suits" in the closet along with gatekeepers like the LTC above. Form must follow FUNCTION. Everybody should arrive each day in COMBAT UNIFORM, work out of ISO container "BattleBoxes" and return home OFF POST at the end of the day to have a real connectivity with civilian life instead of the current government-subsidized grouping of thousands of people set apart from society and reality in the make-believe garrison world of inbred military illogic as expressed by the LTC above. Legendary warrior and Journalist Jean Larteguy nails it on the head here:

THE ARMY IN WHICH I SHOULD LIKE TO FIGHT

"I'd like to have two Armies -- one for display, with lovely guns, tanks, little Soldiers, staffs, distinguished and doddering Generals and deal little regimental officers, who would be deeply concerned over their General's bowel movements or their Colonel's piles; an Army that would be shown for a modest fee on every fairground in the country.

The other would be the REAL ONE, composed entirely of young enthusiasts in camouflage uniforms, who would not be put on display but from whom impossible efforts would be demanded and to whom all sorts of tricks would be taught. That's the Army in which I should like to fight."

Jean Larteguy
French Commando/Soldier/Journalist

itsg@hotmail.com

Phil West of England writes:

"I think the reason that servicemen won't wear Class 'A's is that they are too formal for modern wear.

Modern Soldiers spend most of their time in tee-shirts or open necked shirts. U.S. Army class 'A' uniform tunics are designed to be worn with a shirt and tie. British Army No.2 dress has the same type of collar, but looks odd unless worn with a belt, making it look even more formal.

What is needed is a tunic with a collar that can be worn buttoned up, open or with a shirt and tie for formal wear. The British battledress (No.5) blouse had a collar of this type, and a better tailored version of this design should be incorporated into service dress. The battledress blouse itself was not that smart, though the American copy, known as the 'Ike jacket', was. A modern version of such a jacket might prove very popular with service men. I was watching Where Eagles Dare; last night, and the wardrobe department on this movie seem to have known their stuff. What was impressive was how versatile the Wehrmacht fieldblouse was. This jacket was usually worn fully buttoned, but this was a generation used to starched collars.

Worn without a belt it seems to have been used as barracks wear, off duty dress and informal mess dress. Many Soldiers would have a privately tailored tunic that would be used as Walking out dress-ie, for visiting family or going out on the town.

Wearing the tunic with a belt I think indicated that the Soldier was on duty. Officers might wear a pistol while non-officers might wear a bayonet, often decorated with a bayonet knot. The tunic would also be worn with webbing -either as field wear or for sentry duty.

The Point? - a properly designed service dress could be made that Soldiers would feel comfortable wearing and could fill a broad range of roles, making it more economic. It can serve as service dress, parade dress, walking out dress, mess wear, guard wear, barracks wear etc.

Colour should be something like green or khaki, so wearers are not too easy a target for a terrorist sniper. The brown-green used by U.S. troops in WW2 would also be good. Espirt de Corps can be improved by the addition of distinctive headgear, emblems, stable belts etc.

A greatcoat with a waxed cotton exterior would complete the outfit for parades and sentry duty in foul weather.

I've seen it -odd that you guys should regard your uniforms as plain -on this side of the pond they've always been regarded as smart and stylish, even dandy.

Haven't seen british servicemen wearing uniform off duty for some time -but the No.2 was way too fromal and stuffy (and I doubt if certain squaddies even had a set) -if you saw them out they were in woolly pullies and baggy combats -hardly suprising that they wore civies if they wanted to pull!

Something like the Ike jacket (but with the collar as described) would probably prove very popular with moderm troops used to bomber jackets -more practical if you are a driver or spend a lot of time seated. This would be used alongside the longer tunic.

I guess the army will stick with green -though I think we'd both agree that khaki or the darker shade used by GIs in WW2 would be better -less visible to snipers or if the man has to take to the bush if ambushed.

You can take this basic uniform and fancy it up by stable belts, sam brownes, sashes, swallow nests, lanyards,brassards, aguilettes, scarves and distinctive head gear.

Or you can wear it with boots, helmet and webbing and have a smart but functional sentry.

If the uniform was made of wool it might see use as field wear. If it is subzero and you have to wear a snowshirt for camoflage anyway, I'd much rather have a woolen outfit than a cotton one beneath.

hmm -the germans wore their grey service dress for nearly everything, and just bunged on a camoflage coveral -a option for service dressed sentries?"

www.british-forces.com/fkac/uniforms/20th-4.html
www.british-forces.com/fkac/uniforms/20th-2.html
www.british-forces.com/fkac/uniforms/20th-3.html

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